5 Tricks to Keep the Monkeys Out of Your Prayers

If you’re anything like me, you may find the idea of contemplation intriguing, but when it comes time to put it into regular practice, there are too many distractions to stay on track.  Perhaps you share my problem, there are monkeys in your brain.  They swing through your worries, they climb all over your memories and they fling poop at your concentration.

So, here are my 5 steps to clearing out the monkeys:

1) Don’t over think it.  It is easy to get caught up in the theology of the practice, buy books on the subject, or peruse blogs like this one, looking for all the “secrets to contemplation”. Although all of those things are good to do, they can also keep you from actually doing what you now know how to do theoretically.  Don’t come to contemplation expecting ecstatic experiences, like St. Theresa of Avila, or sit waiting for the dark night of the soul, like St. John of the Cross… those things may happen, but first you need to get out of your head.

2) Have a prayer word or phrase.  If you’ve read any writings on contemplation and meditation, then you’ve likely come across this idea before.  I find it best to choose a short phrase or couplet, to use as a tool for refocusing and quieting the monkey mind.  One of my personal favourites is the “Jesus Prayer”, which I often pray with the aid of an orthodox prayer rope to keep me on track.

3) Separate yourself from distractions.  This may sound like a no-brainer, but I am the worst for it.  For me, the phone needs to be off (or in a different room), not on silent mode where the screen flashes or the phone vibrates.  Take batteries out of clocks that tick, turn off the dishwasher, and if you live with others, let them know not to disturb you in your “prayer closet”.  There are many practices of the Christian faith that are experienced in community, however this is not one.  When practicing contemplative prayer, I suggest solidarity and silence.

4) Acknowledge the monkey, and set it free.  Ignoring distraction often makes them worse, so I find it helpful to play a game of catch-and-release.  There are some distractions that are of no consequence, and these small monkeys are fairly easy to let go of… however, there are memories, dark thoughts and worries that will occasionally intrude, and they can be like looking an angry 600 lb. gorilla in the eye.  Either way, take ahold of the monkey, give it a name, and then set it free.  Some days I feel like a zookeeper, chasing my thoughts around my head, but if contemplation were easy, they wouldn’t call it spiritual “discipline”.

5) Start small, and keep at it.  I recommend starting with 15 minutes at least once a day.  Many seasoned mystics will recommend 20 or 30 minutes twice daily but I am a little more realistic.  For everyone who doesn’t live in a monastery I think an hour a day may be a bit ambitious, but the keys here are consistency and patience.

Finally, as a word of encouragement, remember that St. John of the cross wrote that, “Silence is GOD’s first language”.  The goal of contemplative prayer is not to be heard by GOD, or even to hear GOD, but rather to simply be still and to know GOD.